About me

About Me

Does one really ever know what to say on their "bio" or "about me" page? I certainly don't. Here's my crack at it. Maybe you could do better; then again, maybe I'm the webmaster and you don't have to read this if you don't want to... ;)

Photograph

This is a wallpaper made of a photo of me on Prom night with some of the other shapely whores of our group. Please click the picture to get a better view of The Three Little Whores.

Name: Matt Van Dusen

A/S/L? (A cliche question, I know, but everyone asks anyway) 21/M/Centennial, USA

Birthday: March 11th - Send me an E-Card!

Any siblings? Yes. Yes, I do.

What are your friend's names? Oh, schithe. Lets see if I can name them all: There's Bev "Frog" B., Jeff "The Village Idiot" F., Lauren "Uniboob" S., Liz P., Sadie R., Sara H., Beth M., and if you think you should be seen here, just come up and scream at me. I am typing this at 12:30 AM, so I am very tired and should probably go to bed now. So I will. I'll finish this page later.

Any pets? I have a cat named Maggie.

School Life: Graduated from Arapahoe High School. Taking time off from Arapahoe Community College. For more information, please consult MySpace or Facebook.

Hair and eye color, Shoe size, height, weight: Blond, Blue, 12 (American), 6'2", I choose not to answer the last portion of this question.

Lefty, righty, or ambidextrous? Good old fashioned righty.

Online time? Most of the time I'm not working or otherwise busy.

Online life? This website, of course. Usually I can be found in games like Dofus or Second Life.

Dofus character names? ProteusGodOfBoard, Matterkins, Boooby, Eating-Death, Tatyna, Woofmaga, Coin-Hunter, Kadrina, Glyco, Darknesslolophiama, Vanbrova, Flick-Fec, Dedpet-Holder

Second Life character? Zelda Tripsa

Favorite food? Anything I can get for free. Like Chipotle.

Favorite sport? Does the internet count as a sport? What about moving set pieces? Hmm, I know, carrying 50 lb lights up a ladder by myself and trying not to drop them.

Favorite movies? Too many to mention. Here are a few- Independence Day, Shrek, Men In Black, Apollo 13, Dude Where's My Car, Harry Potter (the 3rd and 4th ones), Lord of the Rings (all three), SPACEBALLS The Movie, and Monty Python. Anyone who doesn't like Monty Python should be shot. Repeatedly. In the groin. With rusty sporks.

Favorite drink? Good old-fashioned H₂O.

Favorite type of music? I don't really have a favorite. A better question would cover my
least favorite type of music: Country.

If you were unquestionable ruler of the whole world, what would you ban?: Internet Advertising, bad songs, lawyers and people who either don't like me or I don't like them.

Favorite piece of clothing? I only ever wear my work clothes anymore, which would be a black shirt that has the Dish Network© logo on it with long pants.

Favorite vacation? I don't have time or money for a vacation!

How long to do spend online per day? A lot.

Hobbies: My girlfriend lack of a girlfriend, computer games, fixing computers, watching TV, the web, building the web, theatre, etc. etc. etc...

What made you decide to make a website? Because I could.

No, really, what made you decide to make a website? I wanted to. I had the available resources. I really really really hate some places on the web, and here I can rant about anything I want until I'm blue in the face.

So why don't you just use your LiveJournal/blog? This is just so much cooler than LiveJournal.

How many websites do you have? I used to have many. Then, Geocities was bought out. I wiped out all my accounts there, because I know they were going to wreck it. I was right.

How long did the website take you to make? This site started as an independent redesign project of a VERY crappy website, which had its code downloaded in March of 2003. I kinda slacked off on it for a year, then started developing it as my own in April 2004. The actual launch was in December 2005 as part of my final for a web design class I only took to keep full-time student status. Finally, the first full launch (v0.6.6) was officially released on Wednesday, February 8, 2006 at 5:58pm -0700 Mountain Standard Time.

Do you have a job? Yes, I work as a Technical Support Representative (TSR) for a little company based in Meridian, CO, called Echostar Communications. Well, at least that's what it was called before January 1, 2008. Now it's two companies: one called Echostar Holdings, one called Dish Network. I work for the Dish Network segment.

What did you do for Target? I started as a sales floor team member. Then I was moved to cashiering. Then I dabbled in Guest Service. Later, I was moved over to Food Avenue. Very very soon after that, I was transferred to Starbucks, where I was a certified barista and one of the top members of my team, consistantly outperforming others in such categories as Customer Snapshots, measuring fruit sauce for strawberries & cream and banana cream frappuchinos without dirtying the cup, active sampling to the sales floor, ordering supplies, putting away orders, organizing shelves, and running the place in general. However, due to conflicts between Target and other jobs I was working at the time, I was fired in August of 2007 after over 2 years of experience due to "attendance", even though the times I called in for were generally because they scheduled me for time I submitted as unavailable to work. It's for the best though, because that allowed me to pursue opportunities with Dish Network, where I've already been promoted once and am scheduled for another promotion after only 6 months.

Do you have a plan for the next few years? Yes, to a degree. Over the 05-06 year, I am heading to ACC, where I can get an associate's degree in computer network security. Then, I will either transfer myself to Metro for a real degree, or...

Future Career plans? I'm going to fix computers, network computers, or something of the sort. Maybe technical theatre. Or possibly making millions by playing the stock market. Failing that I'm going to turn into a homicidal maniac and go on a killing spree that will have the cops baffled and the general population scared shitless. At least, this will continue until I get bored or Bev achieves her goal of becoming a forensics investigator.

Favorite color? Black. (Clarification: The color defined by hexadecimal value #000000.) I am also a fan of the color of blue defined by hex value #006699.

How can you ramble off hex values of colors? A long web design career.

In a relationship? Yup.

Favorite animal? Humans (At least, some of them.).

Favorite non-human animal? Aardvarks.

Why Aardvarks? Because they're the first animal when you arrange them alphabetically, which means they are constantly cheating to be ahead. Kinda like opossums. Opossums are cool animals, too.

Favorite Pet-Type Animal? Dogs. They may drool, but at least they are obedient and regard their master as the best thing since sliced bread, and not just because you feed them.

Do you have any enemies? Of course I do! I don't like having them. But I have just collected a few of the years. Due to people who either hate me for no particular reason (you know who you are) or they are fucking horrible bastards who hopefully will die a slow and painful death and rot in hell.

Ever killed anyone? Not yet and I don't particularly plan to either... unless you don't like my website. You like my website, right?

Favorite TV Show? The SIMPSONS, CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, Survivor, Mind of Mencia, South Park, Futurama, Family Guy, NCIS, Deadliest Catch, Mythbusters, Smash Lab. That's all I really ever have time to watch. Although, I guess that's quite an extensive list, compared to what used to be here.

What are you listening to right now? See last.fm for that information.

Favorite bands? Weird Al Yankovic, Eminem, T.a.T.u., Weird Al Yankovic, Linkin Park, Evanescence, Godsmack, Metallica, Rammstein, System of a Down, and anything else good!

What companies do you hate, and why? Heh, heh. The hate is strong for the following companies:

1. Yahoo: They make a mockery of everything the web stands for. They ruined Geocities, the first and only great free web site host. They followed AOL and Microsoft into the Instant Messaging field. Their E-Mail service has no support for HTML e-mail, or at least that was the case last time I wrote e-mail with their service. Finally, their auctions are more pathetic than E-Bay, and not as well-known. Boycott Yahoo!
2. Microsoft: They make inferior software. They steal the intellectual property from hundreds of people so that they can continue to rape the software and pass it along as their own. They require activation on Office XP and Windows XP. Finally, they came up with Windows ME, the worst EVER version of ANY of their products, past and present (Although Windows XP Home is a close second). Also, the only reason Billy Boy is where he is today is because he's good at hiring people who can steal things well. Boycott Microsoft!
3. America Online: They have the worst online service ever, with too few phone numbers for the size of their network, and they are currently scaling back phone numbers. Their program, which has to be open to be connected to the internet, eats about 95% of the available bandwidth. Also, they clog you up with ads, even when you AREN'T using their browser. Boycott AOL!

Your Chief Religion? I am a Christian.

Your Other Religion? It is my own creation, based off of ancient religions with modern additions. I also subscribe to Techieism, which of course is the religion of the Arapahoe Professional Theatrical Stage Technicians (APTST). Wow, the abbreviation APTST sounds like some chemical you would put on your lawn to make it grow better. If we ever made that, it would be composed of liquefied remains of failed techies, remains of $40 light bulbs, paint of varying shades, and... well... more paint! Guaranteed to kill your lawn in 7 days, or we keep your money and make use of the "point and laugh" method.

What are the origins of your nickname? What a question. My nickname, mattfast1, was suggested by one of my best friends one day when we went to LaserQuest, and I've used it for everything since.

Do you, uh, Yahoo? For the last time, yes!

And now, I am lacking in my hygiene. I'm going to go take a shower and come back later.

Everyone who knows me will be glad to hear that I am no longer lacking in my hygiene.

Thank you for reading this. You are truly bored. Time to sleep. Go to sleep.

If you're read this far- you spend too long online!
But I take pity on you, and may even include more about me at a later date.

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